It highlights the essential work of aligning one’s actions with values, moving away from past behaviors, and towards a meaningful and forthright way of living life sober. Next, your amends script should also encompass the expression of heartfelt regret. This involves showing that one’s actions now align with their intentions, as opposed to the misalignment or downright manipulations that often occur during active addiction. To express regret genuinely includes acknowledging the emotional impact of one’s actions on others. Admitting the wrongdoing is the initial step in developing your amends script. This signifies the acceptance of one’s responsibility for harmful actions.
Make Sure You’ve Covered the Previous Step
- Life is complicated and not always straightforward or black and white.
- Another instance where making direct amends may not be a good idea is if admitting your wrongs could jeopardize your freedom, which could hurt your loved ones.
- But making amends isn’t just about saying, “I’m sorry.” It’s about taking responsibility, acknowledging the harm caused, and making changes that show genuine growth.
- This can include improving relationships through positive interaction, such as spending more time with loved ones.
People get tired of broken promises, of forgiving over and over and giving second and third, fourth, or fifth chances only to get hurt again. When what is Oxford House you’re looking to change both your behavior and your broken relationships, stop making excuses to fulfill your promises. Soon, you’ll run out of reasons to give your loved ones why you’ve failed them once again. Apologies can only go so far in repairing past pain, but it’s a place where you need to begin to heal.
Don’t settle for an apology.
A sponsor can offer guidance, expert input, and information from their own experience working these steps. They can identify holes in your logic, places where you’re holding back, and ill-advised choices (like making amends to a person who does not want to hear from you). Remember that part of making amends is demonstrating changed behavior. Even concrete steps like repaying a debt aren’t done once you hand money over; you also have to avoid betraying that person in the future.
Aligning words with actions
- Facing the past and taking responsibility helps you grow as a person.
- To help you answer these questions, we put together a guide to the living version of step nine.
- More than an apology, it’s about making genuine amends—taking action to correct past mistakes without causing harm.
- The amends process either directly or indirectly, it reinforces positive behaviors, your willingness to take ownership of your actions, and any resulting consequences.
- You don’t have to be the best son or daughter, and you don’t need to be an ideal parent, but you need to show up when you make promises to do so.
Making direct amends to those harmed is the focal point of the Ninth step in the 12-step process. This step goes beyond verbal apologies – it requires a demonstration of changed behaviors and a commitment to correcting past wrongs. It’s an integral challenge that necessitates confronting personal feelings of shame, pride, or entitlement. Making amends offers profound and far-reaching benefits, along with the aa promises so often discussed. Successful amends can lead to mutual healing for both the one in recovery and those we have harmed.
Let them know all the things you’re actively doing to try to prevent these behaviors from happening again. Many living amends meaning of us find it helpful to reflect on our amends after making each one. Some of us do this by writing about how it felt to make the amends and what we learned from the experience.
發佈留言